Tuesday, March 15, 2022

Empty

I've gotten overloaded and overwhelmed with everything that is going on with the world.  A response team from the organization I've been involved with is on the ground in Moldova to help.  Like many others, I've been donating money and medical supplies.  And to think a mere month ago I was excitedly looking at enjoying spring in Europe.  

Going numb and empty is an emotional defense mechanism for me.  I need time for my system to reset before engaging again.  Those running away from war don't have this luxury.  I can only imagine the level of attack on their nervous sytem if I'm finding it difficult just reading and seeing the news.

On some level I can't believe this is happening.  It does feel like we as a species is on a one-way course to completely destroy everything we know to be true and right.  So many people are acting like they have lost their minds.  Makes me want to run away, to try and rationalize life, if that is even possible right now.

At this point, I'm wondering if life as we knew it will actually come back.  Forget supersede.  Just to almost neutral.  Neutral is mighty appealing right now.  Those large emotional and too eventful swings have taken such a toll.  Will we even be able to crawl up from this massive hole we are in?  

It has been a while since I've felt such despair.  I won't allow myself to dwell too long in the dark as I feel the best thing we can all do is continue to do and emanate good.  Add some joy into the world and allow that energy to clean up and brighten the skies again.  

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