Saturday, July 11, 2009

Actually Believe It?

I am sorting out what it is about my associate that get my defenses up. He is the one who told my other associate that "I was in it for the wrong reasons" when I chose to cut back my work week.

Though I realize he is "old school" in thinking and believe that you need to put in the 50 hour weeks to prove dedication, there is something more than the overt disapproval look I feel from him.

He has taken to patronizing my other associate who happens to work the same number of hours I do. Why? Because he is after information about an alternate money making business. So he not so subtly is ultra friendly while forgetting basic politeness with others in the room.

I find his lack of tact disgusting. And considering that he is asking for help from someone who is at least $350000 in debt and is not a great money manager just shows me how off the mark he is.

Which brings me to another topic of discussion this week. Looks vs. Reality.

Why is it that some people come across like they actually Believe they Own a car that is leased, say they are heading up to their cottage when they are Renting etc. etc?

Or from my associate's perspective, Actually Believing that someone is wealthy because they have the required numbers of (usually leveraged) Lifestyle "Show to Others" Items?

I think that because I know a number of people who have recently lost their jobs I am hyper sensitive to this description distortion.

When you lose your job, it hits home very quickly the things that can be taken from you because you don't Own them ie. your house, car, furniture, anything that isn't paid for... One realizes very quickly just how much security one really has.

This particular associate is the oldest of all of us -- 43. The one he is patronizing is 37. So we are all part of a similar generation. It never fails me to be blown away at how different people are even within what I would think was a homogeneous sample.

3 comments:

  1. I think you would find quite instructive a recent book that I read (from the library), The Narcissism Epidemic, Living in the Age of Entitlement, by Jean M. Twenge and W. Keith Campbell. I really understand a lot of people's transparent motivations now and it helps me avoid behaviours like this. Sounds like your associate is a classic example of some of the behaviours detailed there!

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  2. I think you would find quite instructive a recent book that I read (from the library), The Narcissism Epidemic, Living in the Age of Entitlement, by Jean M. Twenge and W. Keith Campbell. I really understand a lot of people's transparent motivations now and it helps me avoid behaviours like this. Sounds like your associate is a classic example of some of the behaviours detailed there!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks Dennis for the tip. I will be very interested in reading it!

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