It has been a while since I've worked on a project with new people for an extended period of time. The last group stood out in my mind because of the high percentage of people whose bios just did not match the energy given off in real life. In fact, it was nowhere close! How could that be? Did they realize how differently they presented?
Despite it being many months ago, my mind has returned to this discrepancy again and again, like attempting to solve one of those impossible puzzles -- Likely from fear I might also be projecting a similar personality gap and managing to completely confuse everyone I meet?
Perhaps part of it is that I also assume that by the time you reach a certain decade of your life, you also attain some knowing, congruence, acceptance of oneself?
OK, I'm blabbering -- How about a couple of examples?
On paper, this woman reads incredible. The amount of personal achievements worldwide and local, is beyond inspiring. All the while upholding what was full time but is now, a serious part time career. I couldn't wait to meet such a powerhouse person.
When we finally met, it confused me. The energy, presence and vitality I expected, that came through in the emails and write ups weren't there. And it wasn't a matter of someone being humble but you can still sense real power and strength underneath.
I couldn't sense very much that gave me a feeling of confidence, and I'm usually quite astute about this sort of thing, especially in person. For the duration of the project, the primary energy I did pick up was one of low grade confusion rather than leadership. Was definitely stumped by this one.
It was like someone else had come in to speak the role in place of. I would never have guessed that she would have had the organizational skills to do everything listed in her CV.
The second person also presented herself as an "expert" traveler who has experienced "extreme" situations. Again, reads like a real hard core, seasoned, worldly, super strong woman. Couldn't wait to meet her and share stories of being on the road.
Turned out that there was so much insecurity there, she couldn't stop talking about everything and anything just to fill time. I had to move out of ear shot because my life energy was getting drained in her presence.
As for being a seasoned traveler, she was surprisingly unprepared but managed to spin it as a positive thing, being spontaneous. And that it was a sign of being street smart to attain a local SIM card so one can walk around in a strange new locale holding a phone up to get a signal...
It is actually quite scary to me that people are listening to her advice about travel and finance. I bit my tongue on a lot of the money stuff.