Thursday, April 25, 2013

Regular Life Update

It's easy to garner an impression from the last year's worth of posts, I don't do much other than travel and yak about it for a long while afterwards. 

How far from the truth.  I don't necessarily even want to travel full time but the truth is, I too live in an everyday world and am not immune to your everyday ups and downs. 

Our house now has a new roof after 4 1/2 days of banging and $8700.  The first day of pounding nearly sent me over the edge until I smartened up, started listening to music and moved to a different part of the house. 

They did a great job.  Cleaned up after every day.  The pitch made it challenging so extra safety harnesses were used.  The shingles have a lifetime warranty so expecting not to have to think about this for a long time.

The saga with D's work has come to an end, we hope.  After what seemed to be never ending interviews (5 each with 2 of the positions!), he received 1 offer and am waiting for the 2nd one to firm up.  He prefers the 2nd one but because of the time delay (2 weeks), he is being supremely trusting that the offer will come through because he needed to let #1 go this week. 

To say I haven't enjoyed this process is an understatement.  I was ready to wring D's neck a few times -- And deservedly so, in my opinion.  He was getting too stressed.  And doing nothing about it to decompress.  All I heard were excuses.  And I needed to remind myself, my role was not to be his mother. 

I know it is easy when you are the outside one observing to be able to offer all sorts of suggestions.  He is an adult.  But he is not a bachelor.  Our actions affect each other.  Thus our ability to manage our own "stuff" is imperative when there may not be an end in sight for a long time.  You'd think that being a veteran marathoner, he'd know that...

I felt it would be useful to sit down and discuss what is happening, what will be happening and figure out a plan for everyone involved to manage the sorts of emotions that might come out from all that.  It is my home too and I need it to be a place where I can feel peaceful in. 

We cannot always control outcome but we can make sure we are being extra diligent about things like meal planning and eating because stress has a way of derailing proper nutrition.  Same with getting good quality sleep and exercise.  It is even more important to make sure you are feeling alert and strong, to handle whatever comes your way. 

To me, it is simply preparation and by doing this, you are diverting energy that is otherwise getting wasted in the waiting/stewing game into something productive while keeping yourself competitive. 

Seriously, I had to literally kick D out of the house to go for a run one day.  And what happened?  He came back feeling tonnes better...go figure right?  Same with joining a riding group (road bike).  You need to do things that remind you of life outside of work.

Why should a stressful job hunt make you sick too?  And if you don't get the position, you lose twice.  Makes no sense to me.  And when you piss off your spouse too, you lose big time.  Why would you want to create that type of environment for yourself??  Apologizing after the fact is never the most effective way because the damage is done.  The point of all this is to not hurt your biggest supporter.

There are times when you just need to get a grip and regain some self control.  Knowing what action points work or even to try when you are stuck makes a big difference.  Sometimes I think D has had too sheltered a life.  I wouldn't necessarily wish my upbringing on others but somewhere in between might work. 

Both job positions mentioned above are parallel moves in a different division.  He found out that had he opted for a position that was in a lower salary band, he wouldn't be paid less.  It's not possible.  Neither of us had ever heard of that before.  Apparently there are many people within the organization who make their way around to get a feel for the company as a whole and they encourage and expect that if your goal is to climb.

Here's where I get to say that I often do not have my crap together.  I am far from being a model anything.  There have been many many times over the last 5 years where I'm sure D wanted to throttle me.  And he is far more patient than I.  I guess I am guilty of stereotyping when I expect him to keep it together better because he is the guy.  And I know living with someone like me isn't the easiest because I just like to ask too many questions. 

In other news, I'm moving offices next week.   Nothing major, just next door to a bigger one.  Timing isn't the greatest as I have time off soon and it's beginning to look like the painting might not be completed in time.  Work otherwise has been busy. 

Life has continued to be busy.  Think I've managed to develop triceps tendinitis from the violin.  Ballet is coming to an end too.  My instructor has decided to go back to University to become an Occupational Therapist.  She'll be great at it.  I will miss her.  Ordered a gift card from her school's bookstore as a gift.  

Have found another dance school out of town so potential there.  Painting classes have been cancelled due to low numbers.  So it looks like I have a fairly quiet summer aside from 1 trip to look forward to.  With all that has been going on, I'm not complaining. 

And the bombings in Boston?!  Like many I know people who run the race yearly.  I even went as far as reactivating my Facebook account after leaving it over a year ago when I realized that was the only way I kept in email contact with a lot of people.   Fortunately they are OK. 

I didn't realize when you deactivate your account, you still get emails and people aren't notified you aren't there anymore!  I got an baby shower invitation last fall from a friend from South Africa I've known since grade 4 who didn't think she'd ever get pregnant at age 40.  Various email questions about travel from another, etc etc. Oops.

Also missed cheering on one of my sorority sisters in her first ever fitness competition.  Personally I'm not into the spray tan, big hair, big muscles and metallic bikini look but OMG she looks fierce.  The amount of work she would have done to get into competition shape is impressive.  

There are probably 2 more posts left to wrap up Greenland and Iceland.  I will likely not be able to get them out before I leave next week, but know they are in the works. 

Sometimes life can feel like the aftermath of an earthquake.
Thankfully this hasn't really been our reality.
Taken from the exhibit in Hveragerdi.
The earthquake simulator (in pitch blackness) was scary.  I did let out a small scream.
Way louder and more physically violent than I would have guessed.
Now, a 6.3 actually means something to us. 
It's amazing buildings can hold up as well as they do.

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