Tuesday, August 28, 2012

New People

One of our goals this year is to meet more interesting people. 

Meeting super people when I travel or when D is on a ski lift is great but it would be even better if we could expand our circle of friends with ones we can actually see again and again.  The way we are approaching it is via joining clubs and going to various events. 

A lot of our friends are in heavy family mode right now.  It's hard to deny parenthood impacts adult to adult availability. 

So last weekend we participated in a couple of events that took us a bit out of town.  The results this time weren't what we had hoped.  

We did meet a number of people but had difficulty finding the connection.  People there seemed to have money and were hiding behind what they could buy.  We had a hard time having sincere conversations.  It felt like they were just there to model which is quite opposite of who we are.  Definitely not our scene.  We cut both events short and were so relieved to arrive home again.

I guess we were expecting to meet intelligent, successful people who are good communicators and somewhat worldly.  Instead we ended up with a group of adults who couldn't seem to bring anything real to the table but just wanted to be a part of something.  It felt empty and unsatisfying.  On the flip side, it made us realize how great our existing friendships were.

This particular group has a whole year's worth of activities we could get involved with and last weekend's results were to determine if we'd continue participating.  Obviously it was a resounding no.  I told D I'd rather pay $800 to sit in an helicopter with one other person than to go back there, be surrounded by dozens of bodies for the cost of lunch. 

Oh well.  Onwards and upwards. 


  1. "It's hard to deny parenthood impacts adult to adult availability."

    So true. My wife and I are in the same place right now -- many of our friends have embarked on the new family journey, whereas the two of us are trying to keep an active schedule of activities that don't involve infants and toddlers. It's a challenge. Lately we've been socializing mainly with our single friends, or with one adult out of a couple.

  2. This weekend, we are having our first couples only dinner now that their toddler is at the age(2)where grandma is available to stay overnight.

    More importantly the parents are at a place where they feel OK with being away for an evening. Could be the start of something.

    So is it safe to assume you and your wife are not planning to have children?

  3. Well, at least you're out there trying these things. Obviously not everything is going to fit, but that's all part of this experience isn't it? Finding out who you connect with and who you don't. I find it a challenge to meet people in general, so having to throw myself into this school thing is very scary and I have to drag my thoughts away from "what if they don't like me? What kind of loser will I be?" to "who cares? Some will, some won't. That's just life and it's the way it's always been." Just be yourself and let "it" go, whatever your "it" is. Have fun!! x

  4. Thanks! I guess I'm too much of an optimist. Thought we'd at least bond with one person. We're not giving up...

    How was your first day at school? Is it a good group? Any roommate prospects?

    I very much admire you for jumping back in! Can't wait to hear what you think of the creative writing class.