I spoke to a couple of frustrated people recently who are frustrated because they want so much to help others but haven't gotten the reception or participation they were hoping for.
They see the potential in their friends/clients/family members/spouses and believe if the right support could be provided, those people would see the light and good things will happen.
Their hearts are in the right place. It is hard when you get emotionally involved with someone and want the best for them. The recipient of all the good thoughts must want it too.
All the wishing in the world won't make someone eat better, work less, exercise more etc. etc. They have to be in a place to want to take action.
It just causes undue hardship wanting more than the other can give. Be there when they are ready and you'll have more peace of mind in the meantime.